Even If I Forget My Name, I Won't Forget You
by Anusmita
Summary: Okita Sougo completely loses his memories after a freak accident. All he remembers, though vaguely, is the word 'China'. Meanwhile, Kagura can't help but worry and wait for him. Can they together bring back his memories or will Okita forget her and everyone else forever? Read on to find out!


**Even If I Forget My Name, I Still Won't Forget You**

An Okita x Kagura Fanfiction

(Disclaimer: I don't own Gintama or its characters. They belong to Sorachi Hideaki.)

Gangsters ran out of the building, racing as though they were running for their lives. Which of course they were. The elite members of the fearsome Shinsengumi ran in pursuit of them, led by their demon vice commander, Hijikata Toushirou and their chief, Kondou Isao. The gangsters, soon realizing that a footrace would be futile and knowing that they would be massacred by the Shinsengumi, desperately jumped into a hidden fleet of cars and whizzed away, hoping that they had saved their sorry skins this time.

However, that was not to be, as a fleet of police cars, headed by none other than the sadistic captain, Okita Sougo began to hunt them down relentlessly. Both sides exchanged heavy fire and quite a few cars were blown to bits.

For the first time that day, Sougo felt like he was having some fun. It had been a long, boring day and this wild drive down the alleyways of Kabuki cho was definitely refreshing. Moreover, being the sadist that he was, he certainly enjoyed the terror of the criminals, who were trapped like rats in a barrel.

A cannon ball from the gangsters flew at his car, and he rapidly swerved to avoid it. And then, suddenly, everything seemed to go wrong. The car, half jammed in a crowded alleyway, unexpectedly skidded and crashed head on with a dilapidated building. To make matters worse, part of the building itself crumbled down upon the car, totally burying it. All the cars, blocked by the rubble, braked abruptly. The policemen sprang out and stared in absolute shock at the pile of stones, bricks and metal bars under which their Captain was buried.

Hijikata nervously paced up and down the hospital corridor, waiting for updates on Sougo's condition. After the freak accident, they had got out Okita from the rubble as quickly as they could. But despite their best efforts, the guy was severely injured and weakened by excessive loss of blood. Worse, the biggest wounds were to his head. The doctors doubted his survival, but they had promised to do the best they could. All the Shinsengumi could do now was to hope. Kondou was far more shaken up and was standing fixedly outside the operating room. The rest of the Shinsengumi waited anxiously in the lobby. Just then, the doctors walked out of the room, and delivered the news that Sougo's injuries, though severe, were thankfully skin deep and that he would definitely survive, though it might take him some time to heal completely. However, as he had hit his head hard, there was a chance of cerebral damage, temporary or permanent. However, this could be ascertained only when he woke up. Everyone's anxiety melted away into relief and they decided to return to headquarters, though Kondou and Hijikata chose to stay behind.

The next morning, at Otose's Snack Bar,

"Gintoki sama, Kagura sama, have you heard? It appears that there has been a serious accident yesterday in the outskirts of the city. Apparently, the Shinsengumi were involved… One of their highest ranked members has sustained severe wounds as well. Otose sama informed me that they were chasing gangsters. I hope they are all okay…", said Tama, as she served Gintoki and Kagura breakfast. Shinpachi was busy promoting Otsuu's newest album and thus hadn't made food for the duo, who were too lazy to make it for themselves.

Gintoki simply yawned," As if I care what happens to those tax robbers. They always create a mess wherever they go. You don't need to worry, Tama, they'll be fine."

Kagura supported her 'guardian' enthusiastically. "Yeah, Tama, Gin-chan is right!" But still, as the egg-loving girl wolfed down her breakfast, an involuntary thought crossed her mind. _I wonder whether it was the sadist who was injured.… Hope he is fine… Hey, why am I worried about that guy now? Weird… I should eat some more, it's probably because my stomach isn't full yet._

But still, even after she could eat no more, a faint anxiety still disturbed her.

Meanwhile, at about the same time, Hijikata and Kondou were informed that Sougo had woken up at last. Needless to say, both of them brushed aside the nurse and barged into Sougo's room. Hijikata always denied that he ever bothered about the sadist, who wanted him dead, but nevertheless, he felt an overpowering relief on knowing that the said sadist was alive and well. However, on entering, he and Kondou were greeted with the last question they expected.

"Who are you?"

Sougo stared blankly at them, his claret red eyes devoid of any recognition. He looked confused, puzzled and for once, truly childlike.

The nurse coughed behind them," Excuse me, officers, I tried to tell you earlier. Your comrade has total amnesia at the moment. He doesn't remember who you are, maybe not even who he is."

"WHAT!"

"Sougo! Please don't tell me you've forgotten who I am! You'd surely remember your dear commander, Kondou-san, right?"

"No, I do not remember anyone like you. Besides, aren't you a gorilla?", Sougo asked innocently, his face deadpan.

"You're still a sadist, I see. I wonder whether you remember about you constantly trying to assassinate me?", questioned Hijikata, looking suspicious. He wouldn't put it past Sougo to fake amnesia.

" No way! Why would I try to kill you without any motive? And I am not a sadist. But I really don't remember anything… Not even who I am, how I got here, my family, home, nothing… so I can't say what I might have done earlier." Sougo's eyes were filled with hopelessness and emptiness, like a man stuck in a maze, with no way out and no light to believe in.

Hijikata knew then that he wasn't faking it. The guy really had lost all his memory. He strode out as quickly as possible and began to look for the doctor. This was one heck of a disaster.

Sougo looked at the guy with the V-shaped fringe rush out of the room. Beside his bed , the gorilla guy was apparently in deep depression. Sougo decided to ignore him. Closing his eyes, he tried his hardest to recall something, anything.

Nothing at all came to him. He had woken up that morning with pain all over his body and covered with bandages. He had no idea where he was, though he assumed that it was a hospital. He tried remembering how he had ended up there and then the truth knocked him out, figuratively. He didn't even remember who he was. Not even his name. (But well, at least he had learnt his name now; Okita Sougo, Shinsengumi captain. Not that it helped him all that much.) Later, two men positively broke into his room and they seemed really relieved to see him awake. He couldn't deny that he had felt a slight twinge of guilt about making them worry. But he had no idea as to who they were. So he had asked them that. They seemed quite upset and shocked at it. Well, it couldn't be called his fault. He sighed and lay back, feeling bored and toyed with a china bowl placed near him, possibly to hold fruits. _China… Huh? The word seems important to me.. Why? Did I collect Chinese pottery? Tch, that's not it. I probably wouldn't be like that, right? What a joke.. I don't remember who I am and here I go, deciding what I might have been like. But I wish I knew why I think china means something significant. But it's no use asking those guys, because they wouldn't know why a cheap china bowl with blue flowers interests me at al. Moreover, I mayn't be able to remember even if I know. Guess I am really wandering now. I'd better just sleep… Ah how my body hurts, damn it all…._

And with that, Sougo went to sleep.

Meanwhile, Hijikata had been talking to the doctor in charge of Sougo and was currently trying to wrap his mind around the doctor's words. "Your friend has just got a very severe blow to the head. It'll definitely be some time before the wound heals and he can leave the hospital. Seeing that he has amnesia, it may be helpful to take him to places somehow familiar or important to him. But don't let him go now. His health is weak and it'll be the same even if he goes later. Presently, we can do nothing. And besides, the human mind… No one can say what makes, breaks or brings back someone's memories. It may be that he will never recall anything again or he may remember everything tomorrow. But if he can remember, it will really be a miracle."

Hijikata sighed. He understood that they could do almost nothing other than keeping the guy in hospital. He wished, for the millionth time, that Mitsuba was alive. There wasn't anyone else who could reach him anymore and make him remember who he really was.

 _10 days later…_

Sougo was utterly bored to death. He still hadn't remembered anything and he had begun to hate waking up in the hospital every day. Goddammit, he was quite fine now! But the doctors and the guy named Hijikata still wouldn't let him get out. In the past 10 days, he had been visited by many people, such as an anpan eating, plain guy named Yamazaki, a crazy, noisy old man with a bazooka and other members of the Shinsengumi, which was what they called themselves. Yet, nothing really left an impression on his blank memories, which stayed as lost as before. But he had taken a firm decision that he wouldn't stay in the depressingly clean hospital ward any longer and had prepared a perfect plan to execute it too.

He pulled on his uniform and put on his sword, both of which had been returned to him, and after casting numerous furtive glances down the corridors, he slipped out of the room and began to descend slowly down the winding staircase. He knew that running would just attract more attention and if anyone saw his back, they would probably think that he was someone visiting the police captain with amnesia. Luckily, his regular checkups were over as well and hardly anyone visited him at high noon, which was when he had sneaked out.

Having successfully got through all possible obstacles, the last of which was the iron gate of the hospital, Sougo decided to take a walk around the city. It was likely that familiar landmarks would bring back or at least, stir his memories, or so the nurse had informed him.

He passed many cabaret clubs, pachinko parlors, shops and houses on his way. He was pretty sure that they all had a connection to him in some way, but as usual, he could never remember _how_. Tired with all the walking around, he decided to go to a park and have a short nap or something. Almost unconsciously, his feet veered to a nearby playground. Sougo wasn't sure why he was going there, but he felt that he had definitely done this many times before. He quickened his pace, feeling that something was definitely different here. And he had to see what that was.

The first thing he saw, on entering the park, was a girl with pale skin and striking red hair. Her eyes were the color of the sky and she was holding a purple umbrella as she munched something that looked like _pickled seaweed_. And somehow, for the first time, he remembered something. Sure, it was only a guess in all likeliness, but he was damn sure that he used to call her 'China'. He wasn't sure who he was to her, but he knew that she was someone significant to him. So he called her," Oi, China!"

She started, clearly surprised, but when she saw him, her eyes sparkled and an excited smirk formed on her lips.

"It's really been a long time, hasn't it, sadist? Were you busy stealing poor people's taxes again? Or making maidens cry with your sadism?"

 _Huh? Why is she insulting me out of the blue? And exactly what sort of a person was I to make her say something like that? Guess she doesn't know about me having amnesia… But I don't feel like letting her get away with it either.._

"How rude you are, China. You do know that you just broke my heart into a million pieces. Really, does any sane girl speak like that?"

"WHO'RE YOU CALLING AN INSANE GIRL?! I'll get your head for this, Sadist!"

He dodged instinctively as she attacked him with her umbrella. He prepared to sidestep her again when she attacked, but she didn't. Instead, she stared at him like he was an alien from outer space.

"Why aren't you attacking, idiot? You've got seriously slow too."

" Because I… have no memories of being the person you knew. I am Okita Sougo, but- well, in a word, I have amnesia."

"You're kidding me, right? Whatever do you mean?"

"Just what I said. I don't remember anything. After that accident, the people at the hospital told me a lot about my past and who I was and what I was like, but I honestly can't recall anything."

" Idiot Sadist, if I find out that you're fooling me, I'll tell Sadaharu to eat you whole, and dump your bones into the garbage heap. But if you really can't remember anything… It's just like that time with Gin-chan a few years back…"

"I'm being totally honest over here. But you sure are violent, aren't you? By the way, what is our relationship anyway? Who are we to each other?"

Kagura felt a shard of pain pierce her heart. So the sadist had totally forgotten about her. But how should she answer? They were and had always been bitter rivals, but then why did she miss him when he wasn't there and wait for him at the playground if he should pass by one day? Why the heck did she worry so much if he got into danger as usual? Well, even though she sort of liked this new Sougo, politer and more 'innocent', she did miss her sarcastic, ruthless and rude sadist. And she was definitely going to bring him back.

"We are rivals, Sadist. We really hate each other and we fight every time we see each other, though we generally do not have a clear winner. Maybe, it's not as simple as that… But I am going to help you recover your memories and then totally beat you up, Sadist."

Sougo stared at her and found himself grinning. This girl was damn interesting and boy, was he having fun.

Kagura decided that they were going to visit all the places where the two of them had fought. Her reasoning was that the stupid Sadist had already visited most places in Kabuki cho, so he should at least visit a few places he had some 'connection' with, even if it was only a site for a brawl. They went to the sakura trees under which they first fought, then to the grounds where a festival was once held and they had destroyed an army of robots. Kagura then took him to the outskirts of the forests where they had gone beetle hunting. At every place they visited, she described to him all the crazy fighting they had done there and he could only laugh at the reasons. Kagura had been totally taken aback when he had first laughed, she couldn't believe that she had made the sadist laugh, even if he was suffering from amnesia and she couldn't understand why it made her happier than anything else could have.

It was sunset now and both of them were rather tired by now. Kagura looked at Sougo, sitting beside her on the bench and wondered if he had remembered anything. She had guessed he mightn't, after all, it wasn't like Gin-chan remembered anything like that. And he could hardly have a really strong connection to those places. It was more like her being selfish and dragging him there, partly because she wanted to spend time with him(she hadn't seen him for ten days, after all) and also because she felt like seeing those places again and refreshing her own memories. Anyways, she knew that they both had fun, so she hoped that it would be alright. So she simply sat silently, and looked sideways at his face. After all, it was almost never that they sat by each other without bickering or arguing and Kagura took the opportunity to observe him carefully. _The sadist was really quite handsome…._

Suddenly, Sougo asked," Hey, China, this other guy who lost his memory, how did he get it back?"

" I don't really get it, but I think that it was when he saw the people close to him stand up to protect him… The guy remembered the things he too wanted to protect, the people he had forgotten about."

"I see…. But that mightn't work for me, you know. I don't have much I want to protect."

Before the girl could reply to that, a coarse, rude voice rang out, startling both of them.

" I hope yer enjoying your last date, Shinsengumi Captain, Okita Sougo. 'Cause its payback time for our comrades that ya'll have killed." A mob of armed gangsters surrounded the park, their stance menacing and fierce. It was the same group that the Shinsengumi had pursued 10 days before, back to extract revenge on the man who had killed most of their dead friends.

"Oops, seems like we're in trouble, Sadist. Your enemies haven't forgotten you, even though you seem to have done so, yes?"

Sougo cursed in response. 'Trouble' didn't cut it, both of them could die here. Even though he was supposed to be the best swordsman in the entire Shinsengumi, it wasn't of any use unless he could remember. Pure instinct wasn't going to get him anywhere and though he would never admit it, his body hadn't healed as well…

" Stay here, stupid Sadist. I'll deal with these thugs. You are injured and you've amnesia, so you'll just be a burden. By the way, you're buying me a year's worth of sukonbu later for saving your life." With that, Kagura pulled out her umbrella and took on the entire gang, singlehandedly.

Sougo could only watch her fight. She leaped, punched, fired and ran, taking out many gangsters at once, with almost inhuman power. He thought that she really looked beautiful as she fought… But even the Yato clan had its limits. Kagura was clearly getting tired, fighting such large numbers of opponents at once.

Kagura panted as she struggled to handle all the attacks pouring down on her from either side. But she wasn't going to lose. Not if her life depended on it. And she definitely wasn't going to let them hurt Sougo either. She violently swung her parasol to wipe out a couple of gangsters on her right when several long shadows holding axes suddenly loomed over her.

Sougo almost screamed in horror when he saw what was going to happen. Kagura, too busy dealing with enemies in front of her, had left her back unguarded. Seeing an opportunity, a few of her enemies had surrounded her from the back, each prepared to deal a killing blow. And all he was doing was to watch.

 _Swisssh!_ Crimson blood fell to the ground in streams. The last rays of the setting sun glinted on shining metal, stained blood red. Bodies fell to the ground with dull thumps and an eerie silence fell on the area.

Sougo stood in front of Kagura, gripping his bloody sword, his eyes wild. The bodies of the gangsters, slashed and severed, lay in front of them. Kagura, still shaking from shock, stared at the man in front of her. Just as she had turned to see the gangsters about to strike her, he had appeared as if out of nowhere and had made mincemeat of them in a single stroke. She could hardly believe his speed and skill, and barely understood how he could do it even with total amnesia.

"Hey, China, you alive? I don't want to hear Danna yelling at me for letting you get hurt."

" Sadist… Don't tell me, your memories have returned?!"

" Oh, they returned just now. Thanks to you, I guess." And Sougo dropped down on the ground to sit beside Kagura, his face deadpan as always. But he had great difficulty in maintaining that expression, when Kagura hugged him tight, mumbling, "I missed you, Sadist, how _dare_ you make me worry! I really, really hate you!" Finally giving up the attempt, Sougo patted her head gently and murmured," Missed you too, China. But don't ever make me think about losing you again, get it? Now let go of me, will you? You're seriously suffocating me."

She immediately let go, blushing as red as her hair and looked fixedly at her feet, the ground, the mud on the grass, anywhere but the damned sadist. Sougo couldn't help but chuckle at her behavior.

"Aww, China, I had no idea you liked me so much. To think you'd remember all the times we met and fought with each other… And to even wait everyday at the playground hoping I'd come, I'm really flattered."

"It wasn't anything like that at all! And I totally dislike you, you idiot sadist! You're the one who likes me, uh-huh. Even with your amnesia and everything, didn't you call me 'China' at the park? I didn't tell you that and Mayora and Gori wouldn't either. You just couldn't forget me, see?"

" You loudmouthed China girl, can you get anymore idiotic?"

"I am right, just admit it!" "You confess first." " No, you!" "Damn, I'll just be going back then.." And Sougo was about to get up when, Kagura blurted out, blushing redder than a beetroot,

" I really like you, Sadist!"

" I really like you too, China. So, as the feeling is mutual, shall we go on a date? We only have memories of our fights, so why don't we create some of our love?"

" I never knew you could be this romantic, Sadist. But when we go on a date, you're buying me lunch. And we have to visit the sakura trees, we did meet there, after all."

" Alright with me. Now, close your eyes, Kagura."

And he tilted his head to kiss her. Smiling, she pulled him closer to return it. And it was a kiss both of them would never forget.

Hijikata softly walked away from the playground, now bathed in moonlight. He issued orders to immediately cease the search for the runaway police captain, ignoring the indignant protest of the doctors. Beside him, he saw Gintoki crouching behind the bushes and taking a picture. Both of them smiled.

 **A/N: Hello, this is my second Gintama fanfic. Thank you for reading it and I'm really pleased if you liked it. If not, I'll definitely try and improve. Reviews are always welcome and constructive criticism is very much appreciated. So please** **R &R! **


End file.
